Two People You Must Speak Positively About

It’s easy to talk negatively about people in public. There is something about it that just seems natural. It’s the old “Misery loves company” deal. When we are having a tough time with people we want to hear that others are struggling, too. First thing to consider here is that this activity is sin. Proves 16:28 says, “A perverse man sows strife, And a whisperer separates the best of friends.” We are to stay away from speaking negatively of others. We really need to do the opposite, speak positively about others. This is much harder, but works wonders in relationships.

There are two people in your church who you must speak positively about. By the way, these are not in order of importance.

First, always say positive things in public about your Senior/Lead Pastor. I know I have had disagreements with senior leaders, but I haven’t aired my disagreements in public. There are times where it is hard and I can’t claim to be perfect on this one, but you must do your best to keep positive in public and work out your disagreements in private. If there isn’t unity in the church leadership, it is difficult for the church to continue to grow. Truth be told, disunity often causes church splits. Every church has people who are discontent with the way things are run. If they sense a divide in the leadership, they will find the weakness and try to split the leadership to get there way. Stay unified with your senior leadership. Go out of your way to talk about the great things he/she is doing for the church. I’m not telling to lie, but say the things that are true. As you are doing this you need to work toward understanding in private. You don’t have to agree on everything, but you do have to understand and support your Senior/Lead Pastor. If you can’t do that, it’s time for another job. God would not want you to split the church.

The second person in your church you must speak positively in public is your spouse, if you have one. I hear about more affairs in the music ministry than any other part of the church. There is an intimacy that is built up between team members when we sing together. When we worship together we often feel “closer” than we really are. There is a bonding that can be inappropriate. We need to fight against the appearance or even the accusation of an affair with all we have. This is a spiritual battle and the forces of darkness love to take out the worship guy or gal. Think about all the people who would be effected if you cheated on your spouse. It’s too many to count. Do not talk about your marital problems in public or with anyone who isn't helping you work through it. Especially with someone of the opposite gender. It’s not being secretive, it’s just none of anyone else business. Building up your spouse in public does a couple of things. First, it declares to the world that we are off limits. There are those who long to be with a person who has power and they think a ministry leader has just that…POWER. We know that isn’t true. The only power we have comes from Jesus. Second, it reminds you just how much you love your spouse. There is something about saying how much you appreciate your spouse out loud that gives life to your words. When we dwell on the good things your love for your spouse grows.
Today, I giving you an assignment. List three things you appreciate about your senior/lead pastor. Make a list and memorize it. Make a second list with things you appreciate about your spouse. Now, talk about those things to your team. Do it now.


Bobbi Craig - May 3rd, 2024 at 9:13am

Jeff, this is absolutely GREAT advice! And so, so important!!

Thank you!!

Jeff - May 21st, 2024 at 1:40am

Thank you, Bobbi. It's great to see you stop by. :-)

Buzz Garwood - May 6th, 2024 at 2:24pm

I agree, Jeff. Grumbling leads to more grumbling...until that little mole hill becomes a mountain! Best to keep short accounts with pastors as well as spouses!

Jeff - May 21st, 2024 at 1:42am

Yes! It's so important to keep these things in mind. I'm looking forward to seeing you in June. It's been a long time. :-) Blessings, brother. Jeff